Water Woes

            The borehole at my school broke last week, so students and teachers had to go outside of the compound to fetch their water.  The school’s borehole has since been fixed, but it is contaminated.  Unfortunately, I found this out the hard way.  My house girl was either lazy or did not know about the contamination (probably the former) and fetched me water from the school borehole.  I treat all of my water with water guard so that it is safe to drink.  I poured water from my jerry can into a water bottle and took a huge gulp.  I thought to myself, “Mmm, this water tastes a little funny.”  I brushed it off and kept drinking.  After a quarter of the way through, I decided something was in fact wrong with my water.  I poured it into a clear glass and it was brown and had algae like floaters.  I was so grossed out that I started dry heaving and actually puked.  I am not sure what was in that water, but I would not be surprised if I drank feces.  From now on, I am splurging on bottled water and making sure my water is fetched from elsewhere. 

            My cousin, Jane, has finished her World Health Project and is staying with me for the week before she heads home.  Sauya, of course, is pulling out all the stops and going above and beyond for my visitor.  We have been eating dinner with her every night, which is great.  Although, Sauya has been a little dissatisfied with the amount Jane eats – she needs to work on being able to finish her trough of rice.  The other night, we were given rice and meat, which was a big day.  We only get meat on really special occasions because it is expensive.  Jane and I were given a pot of rice and a pot of meat so we could serve ourselves.  I noticed immediately that the meat also had some white, slimy, curly tubes mixed in.  Could only be one thing.  Intestines.  I have tried intestines and so has Jane; neither of us was in the mood to “suck it up” and eat it.  I dished some on to my plate and when no one was looking, I stealthily grabbed the intestine and shoved it into my sweatshirt pocket.  Jane did not even see me; she thought I was taking one for the team and eating both shares.  When we got back to my house, I emptied out my pockets and threw it out my back door into the bushes.  Crisis averted and a meal for the chickens all in one go.

            Jane and I started her visit to Budaka by immersing ourselves into the lazy village life.  We lounged on the couch, watched TV, and ate baked goods for the first 36 hours.  Afterward, we started to feel a little disgusting and debated going for a run.  We settled on doing a cross fit workout because it was 7:00 pm and about to get dark.  I brought my speakers outside and we did a work out of squats, pushups, sit-ups etc.  It only took about 2 minutes for us to get an audience of over 50 primary students.  They were mesmerized and all laughing at the crazy mzungu.  After about 20 minutes, one girl finally mustered up the courage to say, “Now you show us and we will follow.”  Jane and I proceeded to do a cross-fit workout with all of them and they went nuts.  When we said squat, all of them simultaneously yelled, “SQUAT, SQUAT!”  We tried to take a video, but it was a little too dark outside.  Regardless, I think Jane and I have found our calling as work out instructors.  Throw out your Jane Fonda videos, Jane and I are coming to your living room. 

            The next day, Jane and I went to Mbale and hiked Wanale cliff.  We felt great being outside, but our legs were really sore from our cross-fit workout.  I kept having to pause every 10 seconds because my legs felt like jelly.  A Ugandan woman was working her way up the mountain and I think she was genuinely concerned about me.  She kept stopping every time I stopped and looked at me like, “What is wrong with you?”  I should probably mention this woman was about 60 years old and this hike was no big thing for her.  Halfway to the top, I think she got sick of me and just booked it the rest of the way to the top.  However, she was nice enough to wave to us when we reached the top.  Jane and I enjoyed some peanut butter sandwiches, apples, and baked goods at the cliff.  We saw some rain clouds rolling in, so we made our way to the bottom.  We got to the base of the cliff without a hitch, but then it started to pour rain.  We had a mile and a half left to walk, so we got drenched.  Thankfully, we had made a last minute decision to pack our rain jackets.  However, by the end, the rain jackets were not much help.  When we were about a quarter of a mile from town, a Ugandan drove by and offered us a ride to town.  He was blaring country music, which was awesome.  We felt a little bad when we got out of the car because his seats were soaked.  Whoops!
            The following day, we went to Mbale to have a lazy afternoon by the pool.  We got home and my house smelled like a fart.  We both looked at each other with our noses wrinkled and asked, “Did you fart?”  I opened up all the windows to try and air out my house.  Later on, we went over to Sauya’s for dinner.  When we came back, my house smelled like a fart, again.  We could not figure out the smell – it was not the trash and there was no rotting food.  I was half expecting to find a dead and decomposing animal somewhere.  There was a bit of a mildew smell, so I blamed Jane’s clean underwear hanging to dry in the bedroom (she was offended!).  Finally, before bed, we found the culprits.  Our sopping wet running shoes from the hike the day before.  They smelled foul and I threw them outside to air out.  Jane is considering soaking hers in a basin of laundry soap, but I think mine will find their new home in the trash pit.  (Then, I will probably see a neighbor wearing them in a few days).   

            On Saturday night, Jane and I decided to watch The Blind Side.  Just as we were starting the movie, Pius, one of my neighbors, stopped by.  I invited him in to watch the movie with us and his commentary was priceless.  I will preface this story with a little explanation of Ugandan perceptions of the US.  Many Ugandans do not know that the US is made up various cultures and races – they think that everyone is white.  We started the movie, and the first scene is Michael Oher walking.  Pius said, “Hey there is an African.”

            Jane and I both responded, “Well, he is African American.”

            “Ah, yes! The negroes.”

            “We do not call them negroes, that is considered offensive.”

            “Haha, I thought you call them negroes.”

            The movie then panned to Michael Oher in the car with his friend and his friend’s dad.  Pius excitedly yelled, “Eh! Now there are many Africans!”

            I replied, “Yes, there are a lot of African Americans in the US.  The US is made up of a lot of different cultures.”

            “Ehhhhhhh”

            As the plot developed, Pius asked, “So the white people adopted him and then took care of him?”  Both Jane and I gave each other a look of “Oh crap!”  We both could not help thinking about how this movie perpetuated the white stereotype in Africa.  Thankfully, I know Pius would never ask or expect me to take him to America.  He kept cracking us up because at every close up shot of Michael Oher, Pius would say, “Ah! He is just ugly!”  It is always a good time sharing an American movie with Ugandans. 

            Jane and I are currently petrified to go into my latrine, especially at night.  A fellow mzungu living in Budaka had a terrifying experience a few nights ago.  She was using her latrine in the middle of the night and looked up to see a small, silvery, black snake dangling from the rafter.  The snake was inches from her face and she figured the only explanation was that it was sleeping.  She made a beeline outside and called her neighbor.  The night guard and a few of her neighbors came over in order to get the snake.  They killed the snake and told her, “You are lucky to be alive.  Very poisonous snake!  People do not live if they are bit by that snake.”  Since hearing this story, Jane and I inspect every inch of my latrine, especially the ceiling, before going to the bathroom.  Needless to say, I am scarred for life.  

           My apologies go out to Kenny - my dad told me that you were disappointed in my lack of posts this month.  This post was written per your request!

Jane and I on the Nile 

Jane brought balloons for the kids - they were loving it!

Max came over and made us eggplant parmesan - my neighbors thought it was hilarious that the man was cooking, while Jane and I sat on the couch watching TV.

At the top of Wanale Cliff

These kids kept inching closer and closer to us because they wanted some of our food.  Sort of like seagulls...